I thought I'd take some time off from writing about random thoughts. Writing itself is actually pretty hard work. As a writer of sorts, I usually take great pains to make sure the work is fairly well done. I can't ask any lesser of myself. So, if I take it seriously, then I'd better make it worthwhile.
Of course, lately, as any cancer patient or anyone who's going through a life-altering event is apt to do, I've been avoiding the real issues of my condition. But I guess it's best to stay on course here.
It's best to record what's happening and what's going to happen. The plans are in the works.
The major surgeries are now in the past, though recent. The recovery is going well for the most part. But I'm far from back to what normal used to be. And now, just as I'm improving, the next stage in the treatment process presents itself. On Monday, March 6th, I start a daily series of chemotherapy for one week, with a three-week break thereafter. I'm sure there's a good reason for the break.
Then, at the beginning of April, I alternate from chemo to radiation for another week. The following week I take another break. It's this second week in April that has me most concerned. Supposedly, if I don't succumb to too many of the god-awful side effects, the one thing that's sure to happen is shear exhaustion.
From personal history, as I recall, I don't handle physical exhaustion all that well. It impacts my mood in ways I don't care to elaborate. Basically, it depresses the hell out of me. It makes me less willing to do the things I have to do, much less want to do. There's simply no way to put a positive spin on being bereft of energy.
Talk about feeling vulnerable. I hate it! But I don't have much choice in the matter. I can only hope for the continued support and patience of loved ones.
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